We dream of things and occasionally we mourn for it.

It's one of those nights that I ended up hating myself for whatever things I feel for you. One of those nights that I'll end up sleeping with my questions unanswered. And I grew bitter within days. Judgmental, most of the time. Like a flesh-eating parasite, you grew within me. It hurts, but it doesn't really matter because death is not an option. 

Your withdrawal hurts me the most. Rejected, cheated and unwanted. Call it with whichever names that you like. It doesn't make any difference. Because at the end of the day, you are not there. 

You shove every nasty bit of truth inside my guts. Subtle, but undoubtedly cruel. 

I loathe you to death because you have a control over me and yet you did not know of this. The more I hated you, the more I hated myself because I still long for your presence.

Everyday, I walk by the adventure that we should've gone through together. And today I curse myself for being a coward.For being sad. For being ridiculous. For being ungrateful.

Good night.